Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Sorry if I put you in that 'glad we're hanging out but I'm gonna go fuck your cousin' kind of position
Whatever. I indirectly made you cum overseas. Call it even.
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
You mAke me stone. Stone fuck fucking stoned. I'm an stoned you cuz now fucking stoned stoned fucking stoned I stone.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
Please assure him that the flying penis statue is for display purposes only.
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
While we were having sex he asked me if I wanted to get wingstop after. I think I found my future husband.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
These tits shall not be calmed
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
Once someone takes a shit in your toilet they are no longer a guest.
Randomize
