what is the aproppriate waiting time between having sex and playing super Mario brothers
6 min
Just bought a pack of cigs...gas station guy informed me i took off my underwear and tried to pop a squat by the milk last night...
officially hit rock bottom.. been yelling through the vent in my room to my little brother trying to convince him to get me water for the past two hours. i fear feeling the full effect of my hangover if i stand.
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
Got paid to make out with a girl. It takes skill to be this drunk and still make money
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
...and with one comment dissing Hannibal Lecter, I suddenly understood why we never worked out.
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
Told a guy at the bar I was hurricane evacuees with no place to stay. Just woke up at his place. God bless Florence
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
Randomize