We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
my cup is half full, half full of rum.
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
Either she's trying to smother me and failing, or she just has a really bad sense of where her tits should go.
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
The economy isn’t reopen until I can get drunk and motorboat fake tits at lunch on a Wednesday
Randomize
