Is this going to be a big send off or a somber occasion? Just need to know if I should start drinking on the train or not.
So are you the girl that gave me herpes? or was that the girl from the night before
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
Olympics start in one day, that gives us 24hrs to think of gold medal worthy drinking games
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I'm just mad because I can't play gta5 all day tomorrow cuz I'll be in court testifying against a craigslist prostitute...
His fucking flight got canceled because the president stopped at the airport he was flying out of... Fuckin Obama literally just cock blocked me
The parents I babysit for are at this orgy. I need to leave.
It was like being run over by an orgasm freight train.
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
I don't care. We're going to fuck. And I WONT apologize in the morning. You cheated on me, so you can cheat on her with me.
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