I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
you called me at 4 am to tell me you found the cracker barrel location where we'll have lunch next week
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Just ate cheeseit crumbs off the floor. i feel like Kirstie Alley.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
Petting the cat and listening to "you've got a friend". This is why I smoke weed. To make sense of situations like this.
Any coincidence your getting married tomorrow and it's the most predicted day for the rapture? Just saying
What a great world we live in when USPS can tell you that your drugs have been delivered.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
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