Just gargled Fireball to get the fish taco taste out of my mouth. Almost as good as gum.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I just made a 90's Nickelodeon TV theme song power hour mix...I don't want to build it up but your head might explode
Just a heads up: The party is Fourth of July themed. Spread the word
dude its may
Work with me here, man.
It was around the time I started requesting "big girl straws" from the bartender for my jack and diets, that I knew I'd probably wake up with my sunglasses on and find my wallet in the shower.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
What shirt can I wear out that says 'I may have a broken arm, but it's not the one I give handjobs with'?
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Do you think he feels stupid trying to bang girls with his small penis? I'd be embarrassed.
That accounts for only three of the penises
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
never stay at a party until 5am. even if it's because of daylight savings. we ended up having to watch porn with the host's dad...
Randomize
