The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
I'm Still in a robe trying to piece together 3-7am I'll be there in a few
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
My first drink last night was a 2-liter of jameson and coke. So hung over it hurt to put my pants back on
No more cocaine. I spent two hours in my bathroom convincing myself I was ugly. Is this what a period feels like?
You're the worst gay friend ever.
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Personally, I'm gonna be Sexy Dobby the House Elf.
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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