I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
guess where i woke up this morning? If you guessed the hospital, you sir are correct.
don't worry, your friend will b fine, they treat virgins nicely around here
Oh my god. I opened up my microwave and there was a pile of bacon in it. It's like my mother knew I'd be hungover.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
do not give him the "i just had sex cake" i repeat DO NOT give him the cake. things didn't go well
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
With the drought our water bill is skyrocketing. No more shower sex, masturbating, or pretending to be under a water fall after smoking a blunt.
And after peeing my pants waiting outside for him, i proceeded to drop down and roll in the nearest puddle to pretend like i just ate shit when he arrived
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
Well to me, someone is not really my friend until we go to a mcdonalds drunk at 4am. It's like a right of passage
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
Randomize
