how do flat chested girls get laid?
he keeps calling me but I'm too scared to answer... Not sure what he's gonna yell at me for: barging into his room while he was with another girl, filling her shoes with dog food and water, or hiding his keys in the garbage disposal.....
i was considerably less excited after they told me my present didnt have a penis
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
my whole body is tingling just thinking about the orgasm hes going to give me
Just heard Miley Cyrus' version of "Every Rose Has Its Thorn". Fuck everything. If you don't have an std you have no right to remake this song
i need to buy one of the child leashes to wear at mardi gras or else im never making it out alive
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
Turns out the average person our age has never run from the cops. Life: we're doing it right.
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Yeah. It's just like I have his virginity and he has my shoes and where do we go from here.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
Randomize
