Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
my shit smells like andre
It was awful until we put her on a word ration. And she rationed her words accordingly. I love blondes.
well apperantly i passed out on the stairs shouting "victory".
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
Not sure why, but I was running back and forth across the road. Cab hit me and gave us a free ride home.
well they never fully had sex so she's like an eskimo step-sister. I'll make a family tree for you.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
but you were the sluttiest panda there and you need to embrace it
There is resin on and IN the refrigerator. Its even on the food. My god, what happens to you?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
Just don't let me do two things: Beer bongs filled with vodka or shot competitions
you were so drunk that when the mouse on your laptop didnt work anymore you decided to just take it into the bathroom and pee on it while laughing like a mad scientist.
Randomize
