My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
just the thought makes me want to clean my vag with a clorox wipe
He threw up over the balcony and blamed it on an invisible garden gnome.
my roommate left her license, credit card, and cellphone on her desk. I feel like this is a trap.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
I have so much boob sweat I could bathe a baby
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
We celebrated Cinco the right way. We took shots of 1800 then he fucked me while Selena was on TV in the background
The problem with adderall is that no matter what I'm doing, I feel like it was the most productive thing I've EVER done.
Did you alphabetize our spice cupboard again?
...You'll thank me later.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
Randomize
