Shes from jersey what did you expect her to say when you asked her if she did coke? Its like asking some1 from a third world country if they are hungry
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
Standing in front of the open refrigerator with a 3/4 empty bottle of wine eating Bac-o's from the jar, topless. Somebody really should've taught me better coping skills.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I find it very uncomfortable that I need to ask you to stop sending me pictures of your stomach
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
When he sent me a picture, I swear my vag frowned. That tiny.
He needs to seriously stop texting me at 3am for sex. Late night and early morning hours are for the guys who DON'T bust a nut in the first 5 minutes of making out.
Yeah minute men are best for late afternoons when you're inbetween running errands and have nothing to do.
still not dressed at 5:00, jacking off watching men's figure skating and hoping my weird roommate doesn't walk in. anybody who says idk how to have fun is wrong
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
If I'm not naked in the back of a cop car having sex by the end of the night, I did something wrong..
Well, he was practically tripping over his dick to get to me so I'd say my new dress was successful
How drunk were you? in an effort to seduce him, you demonstrated your lap dance skillz on his dog.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
