I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
Found my new morning breakfast spot. Hospital cafeteria. Nobody asks questions, they just assume shit went downnn
you're single. I'm single. let's spend vday with the 3 most important men in our lives: ben, jerry, and josé
I just past a guy who was biking and double fisting wit glass beer bottles. That is what i call talent
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
My only downfall is that I can only take shots in twos.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
So, settle a debate for my housemates. Have you measured your dick. And how long. Results Will not be disclosed
i keep seeing little orange spots im starting to freak out
you tried mixing adderall in your visine last night..
Cool. I might be making a sickly but incredibly well dressed wine drunk appearance in a couple hours
It's difficult to focus on bonds when you know your classmate peed in your mouth
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
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