He asked me to sit on his face, but i didnt, for 2 reasons, one, i had just pooped like 20 mins before sex, and two, this could be my future husband. so i skipped on sitting.
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
would really like to know how the teddy bear got super glued to my testicles.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
I just realized that he was my first random hookup that didnt cause a massive breakup or divorce. Im starting to grow up
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
It was total unicorn galloping on a fucking rainbow awesome.
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Christopher Columbus didn't sail the ocean blue so I would have to go to class and not have sex with my boyfriend
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
RAAAAAAAAWWWWRRRRRR
THATS ME HOWLING MY ENJOYMENT OF THE THINGS WE CAN DO WHILE GETTING DRUNK
I am mentally ready for anal.
I’m 37 with a career and a home and yesterday my niece set up Snapchat so I can sext with my 22 year old boyfriend/fuck buddy. Yes. Yes I’d say I need help?
Randomize
