He tugged on my tampon string and said 'there's a snake in my boot'. Needless to say he called me Woody and quoted Toy Story the rest of the night.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
I thought about puking over the balcony or the bathroom and figured the balcony seemed much funner.
A three fingered guy just showed up with fireworks and bourbon, tonight will be entertaining.
GOOD NIGHT DREAM OF ALCOHOL SNO CONES
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I am taking a candle lit bath, blasting some tupac and smoking a fat bowl. This is how every night should end. Did you go take a piss in his car yet?
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Couch. On fire.
Last night I made out with two lesbians while dancing with another girl. I'm pretty sure it wasn't even real life.
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Its like Gods punishment for wanting to party
Randomize