P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
Does your throat ever get sore from being choked too hard or do u think I'm just getting sick??
hey i found one of your nipple clamps under my couch, i miss you!
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Its only fair we share our golden vaginas with the world. It would be selfish if we didn't.
Im on the side of I-10 covered in sweat, cookie dough, hollandaise sauce, onion gravy, and ground beef wondering how my life I ended up here
You were on shrooms and "the trees are crazy green!" is all you could manage.
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
gonna guess the empty vodka bottle and open can of tuna in the bathroom drawer are related?
You know you're high when, "Why can't I steal the duck?!" Becomes a serious question.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
It occurred to me today, whilst I was on the phone to boyfriend number 1, whilst in the car with boyfriend number 2 who was dropping me at the shops to meet boyfriend number 3 to help me buy a present for boyfriend number 4 that I should be having much more sex than I am.
Randomize
