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I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
too bad you can't see the clap by looking at her face.
she is a standing ovation.
he recorded me cumming with the t-pain app on his iphone
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
He came and then made the Jim Halpert face. does that say disappointment or what
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
Then I'll go home and you two can do whatever two same sex heterosexual soul mates do
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
I never knew it was coming. He was cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, cute and nerdy, and then BAM! Best hookup ever.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
she referred to her cum as “pussy butter” so needless to say we had a good night
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