The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
I'm so turned on right now it's fucking stupid. I hate burger king commercials
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
He was from Iceland of course I didnt sleep with him, havent you seen Mighty Ducks 2???
in the morning i found her name, number and address on one of the empty pizza boxes. also said "ps. if you find my shoes please mail to me."
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
Protip: If you slur the word 'tipsy', you've progressed beyond tipsy.
the cops who came hadnt heard yet. when we told them they sang the star spangled banner with us
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
I'm off the liquor
You're forefathers are ashamed of you. They didn't struggle to make it to America so that you could become a soft dick
Jesus christ it's been two texts and we are already talking about dildos
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
Randomize
