Yo dont text me then not text me
i wore my purity necklace wen we fucked. but its ok cuz simplified was blasting in the background
hahahaha. im glad listening to simplified justifies breaking ur promise to god
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
I wanna tell red shirt guy I'm pregnant and use the abortion money for Coachella.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
its like..once you have one emotional drunk night, you can't stop. i feel like i have to end every drunken night in tears and i dont think my roommates think it's heartwarming anymore
The only thing that was weird was that it WASN'T weird when she got out of the shower and saw me blowing him.
Of course, you have to give the courtesy text like last night when I told you my dick was gonna smell like peppermint
Oh I'm sorry does your girlfriend send you better pictures of things in her ass? No? Didn't think so. Remember that the next time you wanna complain how I don't make the first move enough.
can we not compare my dick to a children’s folk tale
Randomize
