mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
Now that world cup is done, funneling out of a vuvuzela has lost its fun
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
I'm getting shit face wasted, and I have to be up so early tomorrow. I am bad at smart.
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
He kept telling me Te Amo last night. Over and over. And that he was scared. Drunkenly. In Spanish.
I think the worst was the guy who sent me YouTube videos about how age doesn't matter, and then a link for natural breast enhancements. Kill me.
I just woke up in my locked bathroom. It's 5 PM. What happened?
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
That hot shower felt like it washed away all of my problems... Except being pregnant... Ps just found out I'm pregnant. Fuck.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
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