I've had that scene from "Parenthood" where Rick Moranis' character is singing "Close To You" to his wife in classroom, stuck in my head all morning.
I guess my mind is just wondering whatever happened to Rick Mornais.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
You mean 'full wolf form' wasn't a drunk text?
i drank out of my shoe...were you seriously expecting me to be the voice of reason?
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Just got a groupon for a segway rental: fireworks segway battle at my house. What say you?
You rolled around on the floor, yelled about being a "half-zombie" and bit that guy on the leg who was hitting on me.
He was just lying on the living room floor watching Star Wars with six empty pack of cigarettes and two empty cases of beer.
In his defence I guess I did take the bed, couch and dining room set in the breakup.
SO EXCITED ABOUT STRING CHEESE RIGHT NOW
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
He just chose domino's over sex. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
getting my period the day i moved was my bodies way of saying 'congratulations youre not leaving town with anybodies babies!'
Randomize
