jess passed out on the pong table. it was depressing until we started singing shania twain an hour later and heard her muffled voice singing along.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
I was hidding Easter eggs in CHURCH this morning when one of the older men came up to me and said "I always knew you'd be a bunny just not the Easter kind" ... Our congregation obviously has high hopes for their pastor's daighter
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I have to be home in time to watch my friend on that Lifetime show about having babies. And by friend, I mean the girl I had a lesbian experience with at a party 3 years ago.
Just rented the SCUBA equipment. Meet me at the pool to test the underwater beer bong idea.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I can't wait til me and pit bull can just be together
Hey, sorry for threatening to teabag your mom to death last night
Thanks again for the coffee and orgasms
I just asked Geoff what he is going to do because Hester left he said he was going to have gay sex with America.
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