He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
I like complaining with weaving words and complex sentences. It makes me seem more sophisticated and less bitchy.
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
WHAT? When did I ever refer to one of my past hookups as "the rainforest guy"?
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
Randomize
