a girl just showed up to class in a zip up hoddie and sweat pants. said she over slept. i guess she got hot and unzipped it , it was only then she realized was sleeping without a shirt or bra.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
Going to eat lunch. Bunch of people in church clothes, and we are hungover, wearing pajamas, and in real danger of puking on the floor. We're about to destroy the ambience of this joint.
I knew it was different as soon as you told me you slept with him and didn't tell me about his dick
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Hey, who is this? Sorry, you're in my phone as "you better remember".
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
Just saw you in traffic. You may have noticed me, I was the corpse driving the white car.
My ultimate goal is to get laid wearing a horse mask... That would be awesome on all possible levels
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I'm ordering dildos in a santa hat. You?
You gave me the best orgasm of my life. I'm buying you a house
We couldn't leave for the bar until he spent 10 minutes adjusting his vaporizer. I want to drown him in beard oil.
he asked me for a magic BJ...is that supposed to be different from a normal BJ?
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