its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
She said, and I quote "how do you run with something that big between your legs".
Also, at 1:30 I emailed myself saying, "are you there Margaret? It's me, god"
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I will have you again some day my love. And our divorce will be magnificent
I JUST WATCHED PAULA DEEN PUT BUTTER IN HER BLOODY MARY. This is not a drill. Real life.
Someone came in the potted fern
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
What time is our conjugal visit?
Umm...who is this?
Randomize
