Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
We've started doing pot butter shots. WHY AREN'T U HERE
No i'm not calming down the girl at white castle did not need to see the picture of my dick on your phone.
happy find a boyfriend by next Valentines Day. Its like a new years resolution but depressing
I'm sorry, when did "I like your shit" become an acceptable pickup line?
He pushed a skinny white blonde out of the way just to tell me "you have the finest ass, like ever."
I have never loved a nerdy white boy this much.
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
it was like fucking a Mumford & Sons song
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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