it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
at a party and just made O-H-I-O out of dicks and vajayjays...i hope someone took a pic i was too busy (; GO BUCKS!!!
wrong asian. never thought that would happen.
Was I wearing clothes when I handed you your keys. Please tell me I was wearing clothes.
i like to finish this college football season knowing that not once have I had to masturbate to erin andrews
Still can't decide which I'm more disappointed about: the blow job I gave him or the donuts I ate after.
Yeah bro I don't know how she's gonna explain the black eye, how else do you tell your boss "my knee hit me in the face during sex last night"
They're not that bad of drunks, they come back to the vehicle with more stuff than they went in with, so its a profitable venture.
i went to the 24h massage place last night and brought down the price for a hand job from $50 to $12.75 and half the big mac left in my bag.
He gave me twenty cool ranch tacos and declared, drunk, " Look, I do good"
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I'll truly miss your penis but your use of words and phrases such as bae, yolo, swag, and totes have ruined how attractive you once were.
Well my parents know I get medical Cannabis they saw me on the news at the dispensary
I'm having a hard time eating my sandwich knowing how many different buttholes my hands were in last night.
Pillow talk was a high five, this morning she made dinosaur muffins for the house. I love chapel hill
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