I heard we made out
winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
The mexican place next the the funeral home has dollar margaritas, our grandfather would want us to act on this... trust me i know.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
only 75% of american men are circumcised...i guess this was bound to happen to me someday.
If I'm going to go gay, i'm not going to go for a tiny dick.
If for any reason you were wondering if i was going to vomit at the airport today, the answer is yes.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I don't know what I'm more pleased with, the blowie last night or that fact that there's still 20 dollars in my wallet
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I don't know if I want to fuck him or punch him in the face.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Randomize
