Remember ______, girl, blonde, one of my roommates the first year of ________?
Yeah we hooked up in the top bunk bed while simultaneously having a conversation with u, so yeah, I remember her
So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
the cops didn't wanna shut the tailgate down but the strippers weren't allowed to take money without a license or somthing
Tried to figure out where I was without opening my eyes this morning for like twenty minutes. Not even close. Not even the right state.
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Vom Wallet is no more. We now boldly enter a responsible, adult era where we will not throw up liquor onto ourselves.
I'm just sayin. If your gonna cheat go for someone TOTALLY different. Fucking her twin would be a waste.
Woke up in your shoes. Please tell me you woke up in mine
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Naked. Naked is my favorite color.
Omg I just woke up in his bed.. I'm fully clothed and he is naked. I'm so confused.
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