he wants to bone in the snuggie
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Absolutely. Last time I signed up for a softball league I had sex with my high school economics teacher.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
Strip mythology. Everyone wins. Most of all me.
I'm home alone for the next hour and a half, I expect soup and and a willing attitude to do drugs from one of or both of you girls.....annnnnd go
The neighbor just yelled bring me back that big red alien penis.
The girl neighbor.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
I should've known a straight guy wouldn't know all the words to Moana
Randomize