I know they r crazy. However porn on a big screen is an easy commitment. They come with mute, stop, fast fwd and replay buttons. if only all women came that way...
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
maybe i get so drunk and make stupid mistakes cuz Subconsiously im preparing for my real world debut
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
He just reenacted his orgasm in front of my roommates....using a squeeze bottle of mayonnaise.
you just kept yelling "siddle that plaza" til the cab driver said it back...
I have sand in every orifice, there are bruises everywhere, and I smell like a distillery. I love summer.
He didn't dress up but kept finding random pieces of costumes on the floor at each club. He was an 80s hair band warrior at the end of the night.
You rubbed a frozen pizza in my face. The concerning part was that it was semi cooked from our body heat
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
Every morning should start with 2 orgasms and a shoulder massage
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
Randomize
