It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
she gave me one of her senior pics and told me specifically to give it to you. In other words she still wants to suck your dick.
I stayed up for hours making sure you didnt pass out in a mountain of your own puke. But when I heard you yell AWWWW FUUCCKK, somehow I knew everything would be ok
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
Please tell me joes at work safe and sound and doesn't smell like jail?
Cutting up lines with the edge of my birth control packet. Just reminding you this is the person you've CHOSEN to be monogamous with.
When I die I just want my headstone to my name, date of birth-death, and TEQUILA!!
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
he just used a semicolon in the middle of a sext
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
I feel like it's the kind of place that would appriciate my Aladdin vest
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