2 nights ago she wants to see other people, tonight she wants to have a threesome. The GOOD kind of threesome. So... win?
no. i seriously look so gross with this sunburn. i wouldnt even wanna bang myself. and im really into myself.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
I'm not sure drinking my way through west nile virus is the best idea. Oh well, already committed to that plan.
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
At the same time that I bought plan b I got some Girl Scout cookies too. It's not a total loss for you.
After last night I think its official. Deep down, we like alcohol more than we like women.
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I should probably stop recommending my dentist to the different guys I'm seeing. That could be awkward in the future.
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Randomize