so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
My dad just gifted me an alaskan flag he stole from the govenor's mansion. He said it was to hang on the wall at 3316, to start a morning ritual. Then he mimed kegstands and vomiting. Senior year will be epic.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I got to explain to the guys at work today how i had no choice but to go to a gay bar because I was handcuffed to a lesbian.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
Wearing scrubs to buy plan b so I look like I have my life together.
No more stories ab the wkend for co-workers... No one else found "and I didn't have pants on when I got home Saturday night" as funny as I did.
Found my ex-boyfriend's money stash. Call the girls, we are getting fucked up tonight, my treat.
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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