Rock
Scissors
Fuck
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
Dood you jacked it to warcraft. you can't come back from something like that
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
recycled a plan b box. kill a baby. save a tree.
I just test ran being their maid. I'm getting 50 bucks a month and they're buying the costume.
I want him to come over and snuggle with me but put a bag over his head. Is that rude?
It's not rude if you use a pillowcase that's softer.
I found you laying in the kitchen with a bottle of vodka and a slice of bologna on your face. You said you were having a spa day.
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
And if I hated you I'd probably say things like, "I never want to speak to you again," or, "Eat a bag of dicks." That's how you'd know.
oh my god I have a fantastic druncle story to tell you. It involves a burrito, a meltdown and a bear
The burrito and meltdown are standard, but I'm intrigued by the bear
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
His abs are so defined he looks like a human xylophone.
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