What did I say to him last night?
Something along the lines of "your not here, I'm going to fuck sam. call me later babe, this won't take long, love you"
all in all not a bad night
Ugh now I'll have to carry around an overnight bag to all the bars I visit tonight. but hey! maybe I'll meet a dude! And need it!
I'm sooo using this pickup line: "Baby, its not the 2.5 inches... Its the 200 pounds behind it"
Last night started off great but became the saddest day of my life when i was drunk in a hotel room eating day old mac and cheese out of a yatzee cup with a coffee lid as a spoon...
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
She said her hobbies include bangin guys on one night stands and then sending them facebook relationship requests the next morning just to freak em out
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
Ps I took your recycling out, the 9 champagne bottles, vodka bottle, and tequila bottle is how I knew it was yours
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
