You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
Voted patient of the month again at the urgent care. I need to rethink my life choices.
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
The last thing I said to him last night before telling him he couldn't give me a kiss goodnight was pointing at his dick then at me and saying "this isn't working out"
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
At some point, you're going to have to talk to a tree and do what it says
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
He's two decades older than you. Remember how you said you wish you lived in the 70s? HE DID.
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
just discovered a semi frightening wound on the side of my head that must have happened last night. if i die of a brain aneurysm, make sure they put "sorry for partying" on my gravestone.
I just turned down an invite to sit on a face. IDK who I am.
What? Are you sick?
Randomize
