hotel room ftw
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
I don't appreciate you drunk dressing passed-out me in spandex for bed
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
This whole bra on the outside of my shirt thing is so convenient. It turns my shirt into a pocket to eat Fritos out of. Mmm boobies
Today marks the 365th consecutive day of jerkin it. I couldn't have done it without you guys. #onlynewyearsresolutionaccomplished
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
He said his name was Tony, after last night I will refer to him as Tiny
THEY'RE TEXTING LIKE MIDDLE AGED SOCCER MOMS WHAT DO I DO
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
Dude on the shuttle bus eating a Butterfinger and watch porn on his phone and doesn’t give a fuck who knows
We need to get on his level
Randomize
