Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
he had the kids march single file in front of us on the way home so they didn't have to watch him pulling me passed out in their wagon...
I'm pretty sure the bus driver knew how hung over I was and hit all the pot holes on purpose. I threw up into my water bottle.
If we can only get laid once in a blue moon, apparently this will be our month.
Let's be honest. I make up for my well below average sized penis with a great personality and a possibly successful future
First week back and I made to one class, its gonna be okay after all.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
They had like literally all the dildos. It looked like a seance for dick. I left the apartment and haven't been back.
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
I’m on my third beer doing poppers in the shower to no doubt
Randomize
