Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
Hypothetical question: If a guy wanted to watch you fuck me, would you be willing to take a long lunch break on Wednesday?
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
there is an extreme lack of margarita in my mouth.
Her facebook status said "just got a sign from god". I texted her and apparently she found a slice of pizza in the shower.
You almost married that.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Do you remember our dinosaur noises from last night ? Breaaaahhhhhppp
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
Spent fifteen minutes in the car thinking i was psychic before i realized the cd was not on shuffle
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
I keep having dreams where I tie him up and eat cookies off of him while riding him. Wtf brain.
Come get your boyfriend. He is hammered talking to me about hot dogs and casinos.
Quick question. If you break the bathroom sink off the wall from fucking on it, can you claim it on your homeowner's insurance as a 'natural disaster'?
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
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