it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
I just caught myself dancing like an old lady in the shower. Have I reached the age where booty dancing stops and swaying of the upper body begins?
I am so stoned and my professor is handing out candy. I love Halloween.
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
French people screaming and throwing stuff out the window. We told the manager and he's pissed and going up there. This is gonna be like cops. Maybe better than cops.
Oh my gosh they are following me around the bar
Blow your rape whistle
Using the balance in my bank account I just calculated how many fifths of vodka I can buy this year. Don't let me buy food, all my money is reserved for alcohol
Strange request but for my birthday you should get me one of those vibrators that you can plug into your iPod that go along with the music.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
He said he remembers me...standing on a snowy roof, smoking a blunt, yelling "you're pretty fly for a white guy" at him. Sounds about right.
it's like i'm making a family tree of tunnel buddies for my vagina
Id like to submit an apology whenever you feel like talking.
Its not gonna be for awhile Im not a very forgiving person especially since you TOTALED MY FUCKING CAR.
If this adventure is going to get us arrested it'll have to wait until Wednesday so that I can bail myself out.
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