STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
i thought i was the drunkest one there til some girl puked in the tip jar.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
It's a special occasion. Hence the 151.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
You can't find true love with Budweiser and a futon
I woke up to him pissing in their fireplace with fairy wings on.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
The kind of drunk where you put two tampons in thinking that it'll last me longer ...
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
She still didn't believe that he would cheat on her so I finally said "how else would I know that his batman mask is still in the back of his car from halloween?" I think she accepted it
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
After 3 parties, all of them busted, and 4 field sobriety tests, I AM the cop whisperer
Randomize
