if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
you left your dildo in my car
rules of finders keepers apply
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
i wish every aspect of life was like a bar. flirt with the cute guy two feet across from you and get whatever you want for free
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I just ran into mom and dad day drinking at the bar while I skipped class and was day drinking at the same bar.
Please don't judge me for my hormonal purchase, judge me for my awesome rack.
i have never been so sexually frustrated as I am right now. I feel like dying...is death an option?
I have need of you to return home with haste, as I require the magical capsules you possess to relieve the posterior pain I am living. I battle this demon with stubborn grit, however I feel that defeat is on the horizon.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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