My Blind Date Arrived. She looks like something I'd draw with my left hand.
I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
got high and went straight for the Doritos. I'm some kind of walking cliche.
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
He started to notice that i sleep with every girl he calls dibs on.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
i jsut waqnnna hugg thw crap outa sokme peoplee
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
Was that your vagina? Received a text pic from a number I didn't recognize. Shaved, so no hair color cues. But it looked like your lips.
White people are beatboxing! Save me.
The drunk fake out is her specialty. She'll agree to come with us and two seconds later we check to make sure she's still there and we see her booking it down the hall in the opposite direction.
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
Aww his grandma died? That's sad! No mourning sex!!! That doesn't lead to good things!
Randomize