Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
deryk tried to steal your screen door and i think sam and brent are duct taping lauren to the diving board.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
I don't know how or when he is sober long enough to donate plasma
So I paid Bumble $10 to see who liked my profile for a month. Cheap, easy dick. It's all about the economics, yo.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
it doesn't matter what you do now, you will forever be known as the girl who fell off the roof
nooooo! we need to brain storm. I need rebranding....what if I start always showing up with my cat or a wacky hat?
try again roofio
I swear to god, I'm like....the Jedi master of dick.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize