If my boyfriend wants to eat his own jizz after masturbating, what does that make him?
Is there a nice way to say "I like you, but I hate your dick?"
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
she asked to have her picture taken with every guy we walked by.
I think online classes were designed around the concept of day drinking.
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
He offered to take me to my appointment after breakfast then kind of just sat there and watched me get a papsmier. Most awkward first date ever.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Damn you are the highwater mark of the naked women in my life. Like idk what lined up but yeah.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
So I missed the eclipse because I was masturbating.
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