Richard, I just read on your Twitter account that you have enjoyed a, "Much needed post birthday smoothie..."...A bit revealing, no?
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
I want to punch and suck your dick at the same time. I don't think we have the healthiest of relationships.
He bought me a pink rose and a Plan B. I really like this guy.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Hold on, I need to find something to wear that says "I don't contribute to your daughter's drug problem"
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
I've made out with more people in 2014 than I did the whole fall semester
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
It's like an adderall Houdini. Right when you think you have a deal he disappears
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
Yeah but him not going to be sleeping in your sink this time.
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
Randomize
