no, i will not be your spotter when you masturbate with a noose around your neck
I Just realized that having a picture folder that says "not for mom" may give off the wrong impression to wondering eyes
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
did she really put a helmet on, try to make a hole in the wall then pass out on the floor ten minutes later? if thats true ill be there in 15
Thanks again for allowing my sister to lose her virginity on your bed.
He walked door to door asking if anyone needed to get laid. Surprisingly, that ended his drought
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I started singing I believe I can fly in the shower and it was like the first stage of insanity
alll i remember is comming back downstairs, his pants were off and he was aplauding me
Family trip though. I generally don't wheel too much ass with the fam in tow. Despite the fact my parents would be pleased if I did.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
Socially acceptable to sleep in a booth in the library? Its not finals but I dunno if I can make it back to south. Too drunk.
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
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