yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
I don't understand how he can't hear himself snoring, but he'll wake up to me sneaking m&m's from my junk food stash beside the bed...
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
I called the bar to ask if they found my Id and credit card and they remembered me as 'the girl who signed her receipt in blood'
I just got eleven picture messages of my dick and balls hanging out of my shorts last night. I guess it really is summer when the fratastic, man-thigh exposing shorts come out...
Bro i heard that. I've seen so many balls this month its like march madness all over again
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
He crawled in my bed this morning, ate me out, and even brought me a panera deli sammie for lunch at school. I don't care what he lied about, all is forgiven him.
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
They actually said and I quote "it definitely looks like your knees went through some over usage"
I was only out of town for 1 week. His cell records show he texted 63 ex-gfs and hookups while I was gone. And 10 condoms are missing.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
You made me brush your teeth last night......for 47 minutes.
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