ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I cant wait for your democrat phase to be over.
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
At some point you realize they're vacuuming and you still have to sober up. Please find me a boyfriend thanks .
I promised myself in the hospital that I would give up drinking for however long the cast stayed on. Thank god it was only soft tissue and not a fracture.
The cop actually kicked the bitches out of the cab so we could get ours. I flipped them all off as the door was shutting. That drunk.
Well I have rug burns in both armpits, somehow. So yes you should have been here
Must've forgot to hang up with her when I was telling Josh I plan to pop champagne if I nail her tonight. She showed up with a bottle and said "only if we can toast it with Josh"
It's funny that when I fall down as an adult I'm so much happier no one saw than that I'm not seriously hurt.
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
If I die, sorry about rent.
Apparently I drunkenly told him I was going to ride him to the rodeo and break him like a bronco, then I stole his nachos and beer. Adulting is hard!!!
Santi's no longer allowed to buy booze in my lane. Last thing I need is a midlife crisis looking at his Id again.
Randomize
